Thank you! As a generally kind and generous person (or so I consider myself) it’s my current struggle to handle the backlash when I put a boundary in place. This is so good! It is actually entitlement that causes the backlash. A light bulb moment for me!
Oh, I SO need to reflect on this (again and again). I find that this ridiculous expectation of being entitled to anything is what creates so much of my own discontent, silly me.
Thanks to all the commenters as well. Such good thoughts. I especially loved the “you ARE the traffic”. ❤️
I never thought about the difference between expectations and entitlements. Thanks for the clarification and the food for thought. And congrats on your Whitehouse gig!
Dear Nedra. This post was just what I needed to read this week and holiday season. Just this week I was tempted to become offended by a colleague’s behavior. But I paused, took a deep breath in, thought about this post, and breathed out the perceived offense. What I was feeling was an expectation based on my standards. Thank you for this post.
I started smiling while I read this, because sometimes when my husband and I are driving and the street signs or medians “don’t make sense” and we start to fuss, one of us will say, why didn’t they ask for our opinion? And then we Start laughing.
As others mentioned: I always look forward to your newsletter. 😊As a Highly Sensitive Person, I feel 100% entitled to peace and quiet inside my home and while walking in my neighbourhood. However, this rarely happens -> there are leaf blowers, kids yelling or crying, construction (seemingly all the time), dogs barking, trucks speeding by, etc. I realize that part of this chaos is natural (?) when living in the suburbs or the city but I also think that we have become accustomed to endless noise and it's not the right way to be.
You are one of my favorite content creators. One thing I get hooked into feeling entitled to is being in agreement with my favorite content creators LOL! If I don't my world gets shaky, I get agitated. Thank you so much for calling this out and bringing it up. I love how your mind turns, and I'm so appreciative and grateful you share it with us.
we, as humans, feel as though we are entitled to things that many others may consider a luxury. i also think this is rooted in those expectations you mentioned, nedra. we make up images of how things "should" be and when they don't come to fruition exactly like we imagined, we spiral out of control most times.
i enjoyed this piece very much. it needed to be written. thanks for this piece.
I feel entitled to the psychological and actual security of experiencing the sense of confidence that comes with knowing life will be relatively comfortable and manageable until death. And the more i think about it, the more i realize i feel entitled to that on behalf of other people -- like, i want this for everyone. This might be one of those things that makes human kind very unique from other creatures.
I just discovered Thich Nhat a few months ago, and have been reading everything of his I can get my hands on. Thanks for sharing this line from him though -- spoke volumes.
Thank you! As a generally kind and generous person (or so I consider myself) it’s my current struggle to handle the backlash when I put a boundary in place. This is so good! It is actually entitlement that causes the backlash. A light bulb moment for me!
Oh, I SO need to reflect on this (again and again). I find that this ridiculous expectation of being entitled to anything is what creates so much of my own discontent, silly me.
Thanks to all the commenters as well. Such good thoughts. I especially loved the “you ARE the traffic”. ❤️
Happy Holidays, everyone!
I never thought about the difference between expectations and entitlements. Thanks for the clarification and the food for thought. And congrats on your Whitehouse gig!
You're welcome! Thank you!
Oh this is golden. I need to check my entitlements. Funny thing, I recognize it when I witness it. Thank you so much for this!
Dear Nedra. This post was just what I needed to read this week and holiday season. Just this week I was tempted to become offended by a colleague’s behavior. But I paused, took a deep breath in, thought about this post, and breathed out the perceived offense. What I was feeling was an expectation based on my standards. Thank you for this post.
I started smiling while I read this, because sometimes when my husband and I are driving and the street signs or medians “don’t make sense” and we start to fuss, one of us will say, why didn’t they ask for our opinion? And then we Start laughing.
So dang good. A couple of your examples were a gut punch. I expect everyone to smile and say hey - in passing. Good grief. Thanks.
We need you. We appreciate your words of wisdom. Many thanks!
Thank you for this post.
As others mentioned: I always look forward to your newsletter. 😊As a Highly Sensitive Person, I feel 100% entitled to peace and quiet inside my home and while walking in my neighbourhood. However, this rarely happens -> there are leaf blowers, kids yelling or crying, construction (seemingly all the time), dogs barking, trucks speeding by, etc. I realize that part of this chaos is natural (?) when living in the suburbs or the city but I also think that we have become accustomed to endless noise and it's not the right way to be.
You are one of my favorite content creators. One thing I get hooked into feeling entitled to is being in agreement with my favorite content creators LOL! If I don't my world gets shaky, I get agitated. Thank you so much for calling this out and bringing it up. I love how your mind turns, and I'm so appreciative and grateful you share it with us.
supreme truth!
we, as humans, feel as though we are entitled to things that many others may consider a luxury. i also think this is rooted in those expectations you mentioned, nedra. we make up images of how things "should" be and when they don't come to fruition exactly like we imagined, we spiral out of control most times.
i enjoyed this piece very much. it needed to be written. thanks for this piece.
This is a excellent reflection and I loved how the comments added so much to it.
I feel entitled and want everything I buy to last forever with the same brand new quality
I feel entitled to others not misunderstanding me.
I feel entitled to not being questioned after working hard on a project
I feel entitled that others learn to figure things out like I did
A stable, predictable future.
I feel entitled to the psychological and actual security of experiencing the sense of confidence that comes with knowing life will be relatively comfortable and manageable until death. And the more i think about it, the more i realize i feel entitled to that on behalf of other people -- like, i want this for everyone. This might be one of those things that makes human kind very unique from other creatures.
Thich Nhat Hahns reminder: when you are stuck in traffic? Remember that YOU are the traffic too. It has eased my frustration every time.
Love this! Something to simmer on.
I just discovered Thich Nhat a few months ago, and have been reading everything of his I can get my hands on. Thanks for sharing this line from him though -- spoke volumes.