I overheard someone talking about everything they have going on this holiday season. Family gatherings. Birthdays. This event. That event. Just listening to what they had on their plate made me feel overwhelmed. We have to figure out which areas of life we’re going to lean into and which ones we need to table or ask for help with because we can’t do it all. Certainly not by ourselves.
Often when we have a lot going on, what we think is supposed to happen is that our capacity is just supposed to magically increase. Just because we have more stuff going on doesn’t automatically mean we have more energy to get it done. When we have more on our plates, we need to recognize where we need to shift and do things differently.
When we’re grieving a lot of us will give ourselves the time and space to lean into our communities. We let people bring us food and help us around the house, and that’s great, but can we do that in regular life? What if we’re having a rough week? Can we connect with our community outside of these more extreme situations?
During the holidays, maybe we can have a gift-wrapping party. When we have a busy week and we’re trying to plan a birthday party and also pack for a work trip, can we ask a friend to bring us a meal? Can we go to bed a little earlier? Be a little better about drinking water? How can we take care of ourselves when life feels extra busy?
Here are some ways to manage when you have a lot going on:
Ask for help
Reach out to your community and see where they can pitch in.
Recognize where you need to cut back
Examine your life and see where it is possible for you to do less.
When possible prepare for what’s coming
We can’t always know what twists and turns life will take, but when you know there’s something big coming up, make a plan for how you will manage ahead of time.
Accept your flow
Life naturally ebbs and flows. We all have busy seasons. Resisting the season you’re in won’t help you. Take the time to understand the cadence of your life.
Learn your lesson
Sometimes we don’t realize we’ve taken on too much until we’re in the thick of things. Learn from those experiences so you can make different choices in the future.
We all want to be infinitely capable. That’s why self-help and time management books will forever be popular in bookstores because we are trying to figure out how to milk a minute. But there are only 24 hours in a day, and there is only so much we can do inside of them.
Journal Prompt
What lessons have you learned from the busy seasons in your life?
How do you take care of yourself when you have a lot on your plate?
A Few Things That Caught My Attention This Week
Depression After Weaning Can Be a Serious Concern for Some New Moms, by Meeri Kim, in The Washington Post.
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. You can watch this movie on Showtime, Hulu, or wherever you stream movies.
How to Destroy Everything podcast. This whole series is so good. You can listen to it on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you stream podcasts.
The Wedding Scammer podcast. You can listen to this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you stream podcasts.
Yasss! Nedra Yass! This exactly PERFECT TIMING! I just had that conversation today. And I'm now on bed rest for the month thanks to the doctor and my lack of stress management leading to a stroke this week. I had a friend ask today if she can't come by this Sunday to bring dinner and hang out as planned. Now that wouldn't have ordinarily happen if I wasn't on bed rest. But, I need to do better with the steps you mentioned. And i know that i can't go for 3 months at a time without my "say NO", "No Commitment Week", and my "Pick Me Up Days" . Those are boundaries gorgeous me to self care. And I'm stopping fear of rescheduling with people in it's track's. My peace and energy is crucial. Even after stating aboundary and the person refuses to accept it I don't remain in touch with them. Even my language I don't allow myself to use " joking banter" when I need to say no anymore. I leave my phone on do not disturb 24/7 because I love it and screening my support calls vs disturbing the peace calls. I watch TV, find hobbies, and make to do/ to don't lists and home made calendars I create and post them on my bedroom wall so every morning i see what to/not do and be my own accountability buddy
I find it so important to make time for rest ESPECIALLY during the busy seasons