The Importance of Living in the Moment
How to stop living in the past and waiting for the future
One of the shows I used to watch growing up was Married with Children. On the show, the main character’s best days are behind him. In high school Al Bundy was a football player, and he had big ideas around what his life would be like. Instead, there he is, disgruntled as a husband, father, and shoe salesman because he doesn’t have the sort of life he thought he would.
There are things in our lives that are beyond our control, but what we can do is concentrate on the life we have in the present. If a person writes a great first book, and really knocks it out of the park, but then their second book bombs, it doesn’t mean they can’t write a third great book. That second book not doing well doesn’t mean life is over.
We have to find our greatness where we are at this moment, on this particular day. Not in the past, in the present. We need to think about what things we can do and achieve today. For some of us who struggle with depression, getting out of bed is success. For people who have a hard time speaking to strangers, going to an interview is a success. We don’t need to chase our success, we can create opportunities to be successful each and every day.
I tell my friends that I am preparing for retirement. Not in the literal sense, but I’ve spent time thinking about, if Instagram were to go away, what would I want to do? If I couldn't create my newsletter anymore, what would I want to do? I don’t want to be hung up on being one thing. I don’t want to tie up my sense of whether or not I’m a good person inside of how successful I am in one particular area.
Going back to Al Bundy for a minute, how would his life have been different if he had just focused on being a good shoe salesman? That was his job. What if he had focused on being the best he could be at that instead of lamenting his glory days from high school. What if he had strived to be a good dad and a good husband?
I saw a man on Because of Them We Can’s Instagram last week named Myron Rolle. Myron is a former NFL player who was really depressed when he was no longer able to play football. Then his mom came to him with a notebook from when he was younger that said that he wanted to be one of two things: a doctor, or a football player. His mom then told him, you’ve already been a football player, time to do the other one. So, he went to medical school. He learned to create a life outside of the thing he thought he was best at.
When I moved into my first apartment in college, I remember going and getting a Christmas tree and decorations during the holiday season. I sent out Christmas cards and everything, and I was single. I didn’t want to wait until I had a family to send out cards and have a tree. I wanted my blue and silver tree that year, so I created what I wanted at that moment.
We have to let go of what we thought was supposed to happen, stop living in wait for what we hope or imagine is to come, and start living in the present.
Journal Prompts
How do you relate to the success you have in the past, or that you hope to have in the future?
What can you achieve today?
Read
How to Say No: Boundary Setting Tips From Nedra Tawwab, by Upasna Guatam on CNN.com.
Watch
Money Explained: Credit Cards. This episode is so good. You can watch it and the rest of the series on Netflix.
What does success mean to you in the present? Tell me about it in the comments!